I do that with a lot of quotes I pick up--work them into my everyday vocabulary almost to a point of where it becomes a reflex. These quotes come from movies or God knows where, but once they are in, they are in and I almost can't stop it. Some other ones that almost anyone who has ever known me hears multiple times a day "sounds cool" (Zoolander), "Thats what I'm talkin about" (Napoleon Dynamite--said in Kip's lisp), and "'Did he just say rings are cool?' 'No, he said they were stupid.' 'Cool!'" (Futurama). I admit that there really are very very few opportunities to use this last quote, especially because it is a dialogue requiring 2 speakers, and it requires that the other person both be aware of the quote and say the right thing. So I think that I've really only used it once in a real conversation. But I always have it ready just in case. To be perfectly honest with you, whoever you are, I have no doubt that I could carry on an entire conversation in only movie quotes. Sometime in my life, I hope to test that theory.
Anyway, the blog is also called "what it is" because its the most random title I can think of, and this blog is going to be about the most random crap since, in the end, I am a damn weird and random person. I knew I wanted to write a blog, but I couldn't think of any kind of topic or theme. I didn't know if I really had anything to offer--I am a 24 year old law student from Denver who moved to California for college and stayed. I'm not an expert in anything. I'm not really that interested in current events or politics, and wouldn't know enough about them to have any kind of opinion that people should or would want to read about.
Just about the only thing I really think I have to offer is some of the random shit I've seen or done or heard about so far in my life. I have traveled a lot to many different places, I love movies and have seen a lot of them (and I recall a disgusting amount of information from most movies I've seen), I've gone through a lot of phases, and I pretty much listen to all kinds of music, except country--that is, I'm sure, until I get my first pickup, cut the sleeves off my flannel shirts and start acting like a true Amurrican.
I know a little bit about a lot of things, and am interested in a lot of different things and meeting a lot of different people. I love finding out about and collecting random, quirky or unique movies, songs, books (and of course quotes) that go under most people's radars. And I think more people should know about and appreciate some of this stuff. Youre life will be better, and often funnier, because of this blog. If it's not, then I don't want to know you because you sound kind of uptight. Or we just have radically different tastes, which I guess I can get on board with, as long as you're not an asshole.
If you're reading this, feel free to share random shit with me, as I always am interested in new weird and different stories, events, movies, songs, et al (i.e. etc.). If you're not reading this, then you most likely can't share anything with me since you don't even know I exist or that I am writing this. If you're blind and someone is reading this to you, please feel free to share with me via the person who is reading this to you or some brand of Speak 'n Type software. But please, do not attempt to type brail because I can't read it, and it would probably damage your computer by pounding on it with an awl or screwdriver.
At this point, I think I'll discuss the first piece of randomness, just to get us started off on the right foot. This should lay a pretty good foundation. I've always kind of had this plan that, whenI'm old and senile, I'm going to hijack a Coke truck, drive for Mexico, and see what happens.
Now, let me clarify a few things at this point. First, I don't think I would really do this, and it would be years off if I did, so this does not amount to a clear and present danger and it certainly is not meant to incite any action, it's purely theoretical, meaning I should be safe under the First Amendment to say this (I guess I learned something in law school). Secondly, I mean Coca-Cola, not coke as in cocaine. See, I really like Coke. Aways Coke, never Pepsi--Pepsi sucks (I will debate you to death on this). I drink Coke all the time. Back in high school, I would often drink about 5 a day, now I have it down to about 3.
My dad is a dentist and frowns upon gratuitously rotting our teeth, so when I was a kid, I had to sneak down to the teacher's lounge in the elementary school and buy up Cokes (which were only 50 cents, so it was pretty awesome as a young lad who really only had loose change). Then, I would hide them around my room so they wouldn't be seen by my dad. I got really creative with hiding places--one in the pillow case, one under the stuffed animals, one in a mini mailbox my parents had given me, one in a drawer.
The best hiding spot I came up with was the vent in the floor under my bed. This spot was clearly overkill because my dad actually didn't really care that I drank Coke, and there was no way he would ever think to look around my room for stashes of them--he isn't crazy or strict at all--I think it was just more exciting and fun to hide the stuff. The other problem with this hiding spot is that it was a heater vent, so I sometimes had to endure some pretty hot Coke. But, you have to entertain yourself somehow when you are a kid. I do think that my dad caught on to all the Coke I was drinking when he had to give me 6 filling before I was age 12--once having to do 3 in one appointment. Yeah, it was bad.
Anyway, when I am old, I don't want to just sit around in some nursing home waiting to die in my sleep--I believe in going out with a bang. At some point I figured, that if I'm old and lived long enough and don't have much left to do around here (Earth), I might just hijack some Coke delivery truck, head for the America/Mexico border and see what happens.
There are a lot of advantages to this plan--no one would suspect an old man wandering up to a Coke truck of planning to hijack it, so the element of surprise is palpable and I almost certainly would get away with that part of the plan. Also, if I got arrested (but be assured I would do my best not to get caught as long as I could, this means off-roading, plowing through barricades, driving to the point of getting gunned down) I feel like there would be a great insanity defense in a criminal trial. I could play it off like I didn't know it wasn't my car because I was old and senile, or something like that. If I did get convicted, no one in the "joint" (this is what some people call prison) would mess with me, because I would be that crazy-ass old man who hijacked a Coke truck with only his cane.
If I didn't get arrested, I would definitely drive as long as I possibly could--I would bring supplies with me, including food, water, and, of course, Depends, so that I could drive all the way to Mexico if it worked out. I would even be OK getting gunned down by American authorities at the Mexican border--I mean, I'll be old anyway, and like I said before--go out with a bang. Whatever happened, it would be a great story--a great one for me to tell if I made it, or a great obituary if I didn't. Way better than playing bingo and line-dancing every night until I died in my sleep.
Ok, well I guess that pretty much sums up an introduction. Sorry, I've never blogged before and don't quite know the blogger-blogee protocol. I hope this is sufficient to have gotten you interested enough to keep reading or sharing. If not, refer to the end of paragraph 5 so I don't have to type it all out again. I don't know about you guys, but right now feel like I've known each of you my entire life, which is a pretty cool feeling. We're bonding. It's a good thing.
Peace out.
Mikee P
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